Those lands, as everyone knows, were one of the last creations of the Lord … work on them was completed on Friday, late in the evening, which is why clouds of smoke still escaped from the bowels of the earth. The earth seething with life. Mixing of metals. Huge sea animals. Mineral vapors. New lush vegetation, greedily absorbing the fresh moisture of the earth. Palm trees that grow in six weeks.
Abel Posse “Dogs of Paradise”
The plane dived into the gray cotton wool of dense clouds, then surfaced again, and the gray rocks encircling the island became visible. We were not allowed to land right away, so we made a big circle around the island, which took another half an hour, and then finally dived back into the gray cotton. When we landed, all around was a solid moving fog and gusty wind. Tenerife North Airport is located in the mountains – it is always cool and cloudy here.
We got to the hotel by taxi. The driver was quite experienced and all the way to Adeje we famously flew along the hot highway along the coast at almost 150 km/h. In Adeje itself, the taxi driver got confused, he did not understand English, and did not heed our requests to call the hotel by phone. Circling around the place, he asked all other taxi drivers we met on our way about the whereabouts of the Sunset Bay Club hotel. All his colleagues gave him different instructions, which completely confused him. Finally, he reached the Sunset Beach Hotel and, as per our advice, went to ask the concierge. Since these two hotels belong to the same chain, the last instruction finally led us to our destination.
The Sunset Bay Club was a cluster of 4-storey white buildings scattered over a large area on the side of a mountain. All staff spoke excellent English with a British accent. As we found out later, only Brits in their 40s stayed at this hotel. Small restaurants located directly under our window offered traditional English and Irish cuisine, which we got bored of on the first day. Since our room was on the 4th floor, just above the restaurants that were buzzing and smoking until two in the morning, we had a very quiet and secluded spacious terrace, with a nice view of the entire resort town.
When you go to Tenerife, there is no point in purchasing an all-inclusive vacation, since you’d want to get a chance to try the food in local restaurants. There were so many restaurants that any time it was time to have lunch or dinner, we couldn’t decide where to go. But anywhere we went, they had low prices and good quality. Local beer was cheaper than bottled water – 1 euro per half liter.
Soon upon arrival, we took a tour to the Teide Volcano. Unfortunately, the cableway was closed that day, and we couldn’t go all the way up the mountain. Although the volcano has not been active for a long time, vapors of some gases are constantly present above the crater. As a result, the peak of the mountain is covered with a light white cloud that looks like a scarf. According to the guide, the temperature of the magma inside the mountain is 600°C. The last eruption here happened a hundred years ago when a smaller volcano erupted (not the main one). The Canary Islands were formed as a result of the eruption of magma from the bottom of the sea. Everything here is made of volcanic rock – mountains, sand, stones. There is also unique vegetation, but more on that below.
The Teide Volcano is surrounded by the “lunar” valley, covered with solidified lava. Among the plants that manage to grow here are carrot-shaped turrets with small purple flowers that bloom once a year. We just caught them blooming.
Then we drove to the Chinchado rocks, a cluster of bizarre shaped massive stones. There were two Russian girls wearing a night club makeup sitting just behind us in the bus who apparently spent a whole night at some bar. Despite that fact, they were gobbling up sandwiches on the road and bravely climbing the rocks in miniskirts and platform shoes, to the admiration of local dudes.
Watch a video about Teide here.
Playa Torviscas and Playa Fanabe are considered one of the best beaches in Tenerife. Hot gray volcanic sand, calm, mirror-like sea, and majestic sunsets. Unlike other popular places, such as Las Americas (Playa de las Americas), known for its buzzing nightlife, Adeje is very quiet. It’s dominated by couples with kids and teenagers, as well as older tourists. 99% of vacationers are Europeans, mostly English, Spaniards, Germans, Russians, Scandinavians. Most shops and restaurants speak good English, although there are some where only Spanish is understood.
Our most memorable excursion was the trip to the Island of Gomera, located just 30 min from Tenerife by ferry. The huge ferry loaded with passengers and cars departs every hour from the port of Los Cristianos. It was too windy at stern of the ferry so we stayed mostly inside the passenger cabin which had toilets, a bar, and comfortable seats. I was fine on the way to Homera, but on the way back, after a whole day in the hot sun, I ended up being sea sick. I sat grasping the seat handles, my head between my knees, like a goose.
Gomera has many legends. The tour starts from the capital of the island, San Sebastian, where Columbus house is located. He stopped here before going to discover America. Here he was received by the Spanish aristocrat Beatriz Bobadilla, who became his mistress. Our guide Maria told us some interesting stories about the inhabitants of Homera, none of which could find online either in English or in Russian. For example, how Beatrice was widowed before meeting Columbus. Her husband, who was granted possession of the island by the Spanish queen, was a great lover of women. Bobadilla and her husband brutally killed local residents, the Guanches, who did not want to obey the Spanish invaders who captured their lands.
avno that to enter into a relationship with his own sister).
In search of materials about this legend, I came across a book by the Argentine writer Abel Posse “Dogs of Paradise”. This book is about the life path of Columbus, about how he decided to become a navigator and go in search of new lands, which he considered paradise, about his meeting with the Castilian queen Isabella, who made him an admiral and, of course, about Columbus’s erotic adventure on the island Homer :-))))), visiting the sexual maniac Bobadilla.
““She lived alone in the Tower… She kept wolves and lions. She ate the meat of wild boars and deers shot high in the mountains. Sometimes she ordered shark fins and rays to be delivered to the Tower and cooked them the Japanese way – in a bitter lemon marinade. Thick soups were cooked from this, they helped her in love affairs. About the devilish lust of Beatrice was fame throughout the district. If the fishermen happened to approach the island of Gomere at night, they listened to the desperate cries of her hapless lovers. Blocks, whips, stocks, spiked leather belts, cypress rods soaked in brine and vinegar. Servants in hoods pulled over their faces. Love is red or yellow, Beatrice’s love was dark brown. Almost all of her lovers – fishermen, lost sailors, captured Guanche leaders, overly nimble church servants – at the end of the night were thrown down into the sea, through the north window of the Tower. But it also had its own attraction. Despite the terrible rumors, it was hard not to accept the invitation of the famous beauty. In the era of severe prohibitions on any sensual impulses, who will miss the opportunity, who will refuse to endure torture from a naked woman? In addition, everyone must have hoped to tame her temper with soft tenderness, to arouse reciprocal love …” This is how Beatrice Bobadilla is described by Abel Posse. Having read this book before my trip to Homer’s Island, I would probably look at this unremarkable medieval tower, which today is about a hundred meters from the seashore, with different eyes.
But on the day of the tour, I didn’t know anything about it. However, there were many other exciting experiences on Homer….
After visiting a small garden with bulk papayas and plantains (small bananas), we went to a shop where we bought several national souvenirs – palm syrup ( obtained from local palms and considered by the locals as an energy healing drink), almagrote sauce and homeron – palm syrup combined with grape vodka, recommended by our guide as a natural viagra. Then we were taken to a restaurant where they served pumpkin soup with the same almagrote sauce. Both the soup and the sauce were the same orange color, and they were suggested to be eaten together for piquancy. However, this sauce went well with both bread and chicken, and since it was very tender and spicy, I certainly ate more than necessary … For those who are planning to go to the Canary Islands, keep in mind that the food here is very tasty everywhere, but the sea shakes a lot, so control your appetite so that you don’t have to regret it later :-))).
In the same restaurant, we were shown the unique language of silbo whistling . According to the guide, in ancient times, this language was the main means of communication on the island, as the rocks transmit the sound of the whistle well. With the help of this whistle, the Homerians could transmit messages from one end of the island to the other (without any special devices, mind you!) According to one hypothesis, the ancient Romans pulled out the tongues of the inhabitants of North Africa, whom they took out on ships to sell into slavery, and they learned to communicate without language – with the help of a whistle. Some of these ships could end up on Homer. The Homerians whistle, indeed, without using their tongue, putting their fingers into the genus. So that the whistle language does not die out, it is officially taught in local schools. You can listen to the whistle here .
In the afternoon we visited Garajuan National Park , whose name comes from the names of Princess Gara and Prince Juan, Canarian Romeo and Juliet, whose wedding was prevented by a volcanic eruption, interpreted by their families as an unkind sign from above. Juan sailed to Gara from Tenerife to Gomera, where they joined and threw themselves off the highest mountain of the island. This mountain and the forest surrounding it were named Garajuan. Garajuan Park is unique and included in the UNESCO World Heritage List. It is believed that this is the remnant of an ancient forest that covered most of Europe in the Tertiary period (more than 2 million years ago). There are many endemic plants and animals (that is, those that are not found anywhere else in the world), for example, tree-like chamomile and tree-like dandelion.
In general, despite the heat (it was 37 degrees that day), motion sickness on the ferry and on mountain serpentines, the trip to Homer Island justified itself, and I would not hesitate to go there again.




